In my New-Year’s dream I look into dark room. It’s few minutes after midnight, the calendar tells 1st of January. In front of me I can see figure standing beside a window silently and without move watching fireworks painting in the night sky. It’s little cold in that room, but the figure doesn’t shiver at all, like it didn’t feel the low temperature. In can hear muffled explosions of petards coming from afar, which means people out there are celebrating the end of past year and beginning of the one coming. Whose is that silhouette almost overlaid by all these lights? Why is it standing motionless at the window instead of rejoicing with others? And why is it alone?
I would like to reach out my hand and let it know I’m here, draw attention to see it’s face. I’m standing close, but ending in infinity...or is it the other one? I don’t know. My thoughts are going back to the meaning of right now happening moments. I retrospectively look at 365 days passed since the last daybreak of the year. Maybe this is the reason why the silhouette can’t turn around and show its face. Does it have one anyway? Maybe past events left it without joyful or sad wrinkles, without meaningful eyes and solid lips. Did past year brought something worthy of mention?
Perhaps I should imagine another silhouette, which would be tall and slim, it wouldn’t fade in lights and could show it’s face shamelessly. I’d want to forget it quickly anyway, so it wouldn’t be disappointed of me.
What and why are we celebrating? The end of successful year? Why to celebrate this, shouldn’t we be sad because of it’s end? Or are we celebrating arrival of the next one? Why is that? Do we know it will be good and worth exalting? Are we celebrating something specific, or just so we can rejoice anything?
My wish to myself and everyone reading this is that figure, which won’t be unknown, won’t be just standing in front of window, but having a great time with others, celebrating something worth celebrations. Let’s its face be full of joy, which won’t be fake, but earned.